where i work is right across the street from none other than mr. danke shea himself, wayne newton. go vegas.

now everyday on my lunch break when i go outside for either food or a cigarette, or both, i hear something in the air that almost sounds like a pathetic lost kitten that's lost it's way... but the thing is, it's way too loud to be a kitten, nor have i found any hidden cat anymore looking for it's mommy.

further facts about this phantom cat... this cat woulda probably died a while ago, this has been going on for the past few months, and this cry is too pathetic to not be something dying.

well... getting back to wayne newton, i found out today that wayne newton has peacocks at his place. and that cat noise i thought it was, is actually his horney chick peacocks asking for some beautifully plumed guy peacock wang.

holy shitballs!

the more i listened to the mating call of the peacock, it started sounding more birdlike with my new found knowledge (fun fact, this was the 2nd time i had mistaken a bird noise for a cat today. spiffy huh?), and the more and more i listened, the more it actually sounded like these pole hungry peacocks where actually saying "GET OFF GET OFF GET OFF" over and over and over again.

so basically since this is a mating call, and not a "gee your peacock ass sucks get the fuck offa me" call, basically peacock chicks are telling the guys exactly what they want... to get off!

as annoying as they are, i think peacocks are my new favorite horney animals.

in other news, i fucking hate wayne newton, and i wish he'd move. that guy's an asshole.

also something my brain perked upon. does anyone else wonder how the hell california still has any self respect when everyone refers to arnold schwartzenegger as the govenator now? it's bad enough the recall election was a "total recall" /groan, but now the gov. is openly called a ridiculous nickname coined from a great duo (and shameful third) of movies where he played a killer robot driving instructor that travels back in time for some reason.

-excelsior-