well i'm not in hollywood right now... after a whole lotta thought, i alwmost went today.. but i figured running out of gas on ventura wasn't a smart idea, so i just came home after work, after talkin to damian and all about his digital recorder at home.. i'm gonna have him mix and burn my cd's for me before i take em to get finalized... i'm slowly compiling my album art lately... i thought of a clever idea.. all my album art is gonna be pictures of me made black and white and photocopies of various parts of me and lyrics of the album.. then i'll take it all to kinkos (when i actually have money to be putting it together.. seeing as how all of this is free currently.. me abusing the copy machine at work and all) and get it made into a cd book.. well, the size of it and all.. cos they do that shit you know.

but yeah... work today was sooo fuckin boring.. krizia i guess was uber busy last night... it was uber-busy today to.. i seriously had almost a full hour of making food in the back.. and it just kept coming... never did understand why the fuck people eat at borders or get coffee here when we're in a mall that has a gloria jeans coffee, and starbucks right around the corner.. and there's places to eat everywhere... why us? twatever.. but besides all of that i got burnt by the sun's "soundtrack to personal revolution" and superjoint ritual's "use once and destroy" today... mark came by.. i haven't seen him since the day i left for missy's, so it's been almost 2 weeks since i last saw him... but he handed me off those 2 cd's and he's getting me some new shit tomorrow.. i wont be at work but he's putting it in my box.. i'm finally getting my killswitch engage cd!!! i should have mark check out atreyu lamb of god and december... i know he'll love em... i'm slowly getting mark into hard/grind/metalcore.. and it all started with dillinger and posion the well.... i love spreading my musical tastes... i'm border's everymusic man that doesn't work in the music section.. give me a genre and i can find a cool band you should hear in it... damn this superjoint ritual cd is bad ass... i wouldn't give it the 5 stars that rocksound magazine gave it... but it is a badass hardcore cd... totally not pantera style.. i love that about all of phil's side projects.. they DON'T sound like pantera... like down is all sludgecore stoner rock, superjoint is hardcore, nola is borderline black metal and he's got liek 8 others or something... i hope pantera'll put out one last cd... everyone's busy doing everything else and they supposedly "broke up" but i know the cowboys from hell'll come back and kick some ass.. damn i fuckin love pantera...

i finished my resume info today to... another reason i didn't go to amoeba today... i needed dreamy steve and jack's numbers.. i got dreamy steves from cindy cos he's in gettysburg right now for a history class... and i got jack's off the cafeboard... it's technically a good thing to be tight with your boss when you put em for a refrence.. and i know dreamy steve will hook me up and say i definitly know my music chops... dear jumpin jehosiphat i need out of borders before i crack up and start stabbing everyone in sight with plastic spoons... my knuckles cracked open to and i have a blister on my tounge.. it doesn't feel to keen.. but for some reason when you have blisters on your tounge and you chew on them.. you just can't stop.... it's almost an enjoyable pain....wierd.

tomorrow is gonna be sooooooo fun *dripping with sarcasim*... i get to walk around the valley to various musical stores and try to obtain employment there.. so far moby disc, cd trader and sam ash are my only destination (sam ash is an instrument store)... i'm so happy that new soulfly's coming out next tuesday.. and new ash to... it comes with a dvd just like the slim shady show.. i think i'll pick up all 3 on friday when i get paid.. i need that and i gotta buy my poison the well ticket... yeah i know... i already saw them earlier this month.. but it's fuckin poison the well.. why NOT see them twice in one month? and last time was with missy so it was special... this time is just flat out brutality and pit jumping good fun... i never understoop why there was a mosh pit durring rufio... i mean it's like people want to start a pit for every band nowadays... rufio is your typical pop punk emo band... they're not very mosh pit worthy.. i can see jumping up and down and having a good ole time, but i can't see moshing to it... i kinda hope i'll see some other jack ass doing the pentacostal rally dance at this show to just to remind me of missy (even though they'll most likely be playing the exact same set)... i gotta get my warped tour ticket soon.... if i'm gonna go.. i really want to.. i haven't gotten a chance to see thursday yet live and i really want to.. i coulda seen them a while back when missy first told me to check them out.. i think they where playing with saves the day, which is one of the reasons (besides i couldn't get ticket money in 2 days when she told me about the concert) i didn't go.. cos jebus saves the day sucks goat testicals... if you wanna listen to a crappy whiney emo band.. that's who you wanna listen to... ever notice how funny chris carraba looks when he sings? i was looking at some picture of him from the unplugged show (which is stupid like all get out, cos when the hell is he plugged?)and whenever i see pics of him playing he always has the wierdest looks.... it's fuuuunny... it kinda sucks that warped tour is that last show i'm gonna be seeing this summer to conserve money for missy cos weezer and dashboard confessional (i belive with the strokes on certain dates.. which possibly means any show in california since we always get everyone so i'd have to sit thru that crap) are coming here this summer... as well as korn and deadsy... but i think i'll be gone when korn and deadsy are here (and unfortunatly puddle of mudd is gonna be there to... one reason i avoided the deftones godsmack show last summer.. besides that chino blew out his voice cos he was sick by the time teh irvine show came up leaving puddle of mudd and cky with godsmack.. thus reducing it to "worst show ever" status)... and i'm so avoiding ozzfest like the plauge... i mean come on.. andrew w.k, adema and p.o.d on the mainstage.. and it's just ozzy, not black sabbath... that's a good waste of 35 bucks that i could use to see nfg, quarashi, glassjaw, thursday, rancid, ect. for the warped tour, and that's as expensive as tickets get.

note to self... sharon osborne sucks

i'd be leaving by the time the main stage started anyways... i mean the only good bands are on the second and third stages... system of a down isn't worth it live to sit thru zakk wylde, adema, ect. cos as i've said numerous times.. system of a down sucks live... but yeah.. apex theory, otep, hatebreed, ill nino, meshuggah... all great stuff.. but that's about al i'd wanna watch.. but question... WHY DOES THE UK GET SLAYER?!!!!!!!!!

but oh well.. if i can manage, there's the extreme steel tour with slayer and soulfly with in flames, but i doubt i can go.. i need to go to see missy.. oh the pains of the love of my life not living here... but oh well.. seeing missy's a lot better than getting the shit kicked out of me in the slayer pit.

on a closing note.. when did i say i wasn't gonna write in my diary anymore? i'm sorry if i implyed it.. i need to write in my diary.. just to get all of that shit in my head out... all the random pointless thoughts no one but me cares about... that's why my entries get so lengthy... just me thinking and writing at the same time.. cuttingloose and letting go.. going on and on and on and on and on into whatever... so don't worry.,... i don't plan on leaving you guys anytime soon.. i haven't even had this for half a year yet...

in closing.. metalcore fans.. go buy burnt by the sun "soundtrack to personal revolution" and december's "the lament configuration"

-excelsior-