i've seemingly all but abandoned my diary... /sigh.

i feel bad, i really do. but alas my creative juices are all but totally stifled since i only write at work. that and how many times can i say "i go home, i get drunk, i go to sleep, i go to work, wash, rinse, repeat."

redundant... that best sums it all up. but at least i've made the first few violently tragic steps twoards trying to make a genuine positive impact on my life.

basically i officially quit FFXI with no looking back. i gave away all that i owned that wasn't rare/ex and logged out, deleted my content id's and uninstalled the game from my hard drive. no more will i live under that mind numbing opression known as FFXI. if i do come back, it wont be until the xbox 360, and that's a complete maybe, not a yes.

i figure this time in my life, i need to close doors to things that are holding me back from being creative and productive in life.. i need something that's going to force me to direct my boredom and apathy into a medium that i want to unload something into. unfortunatly playing a videogame for 6 hours everynight, sometimes more isn't helping matters at all.

also at work, i'm once again on the verge of being fired. which i can't do. i wanna coast along on unemployment for a bit. if i can get unemployment checks, then i can focus less on a job and more on doing something where i don't have to get a piece of shit job.

in also better news, kathryn and i are warming back up to each other... i hope. she seems shakey about it all... which is understandable. but i can't think of anything more than i'd want. not nessecarily for stability, but because i wanna be with her so bad.

last night was fun, vegas dinged 100, and i was there for the party. weezer and the red hot chili peppers rocked vegas in the best way they can. then me and suke went out to get sushi. mmmm sushi.

also we've started a DnD campaign too, i'm playing an elven rouge... nifty huh?

backstory: I grew up in the elven city of T'rasllan. not appeased by the rigid social life of the elven culture i sook out a way to release all the pent up confusion and boredom i was feeling. i took up petty stealing at first. a few things here and there. aside from the usual amusment elves usually feel, stealing was a source of great excitment for myself. i grew from a few things here and there, to much bigger heists. unfortunatly, in a small city, people tend to notice where things head to.
i was imprisoned and sentanced to death as an example to all who might be thinking of following my path. however, in my training as a thief, i'd gained a nice lock picking skill, one that i used to break my way out of prison.
free from my cell i snuck away from the city i'd grown up in, in search of fortune and adventure at first. then i found none. after wandering in the woods for a while i began wondering if maybe i was wrong and there was something i was searching for that thievery only filled for the moment.

the story then picks up with me stumbling across suke's gnome monk character, wherever else we head from there, well, that's for our DM to figure out.

ugh, last hour of work... i hate the last hour of work. i need something to make the time fly... i should take up doing macrame or something.

oh well... later guys. here's to the future...

-excelsior-